the dog's in the kitchen
me shoes are on the stove
uncle's round the bend
and nobody knows
we just had dinner
and somethin went awry
everybody's loaded and we don't know why!
when nan wasn't lookin
pop snuck to the stove
took out the rum
from beneath e's coat
up went the bottle
out flowed da rum
poured it in the gravy
and the madness had begun
GRAVY BYZ
dirty cousin phonsey
grows dope out in his shed
sittin in the parlour
out of ee's fuckin head
sneaks to the kitchen
with a brand new plan
all he's gotta do
is get past nan
her big old bowl of savoury
e swaps it with ee's weed
mix it with the breadcrumbs
for a deadly old feed
stuff it in the bird
close her up the back
throw her in the oven
and give the door a smack
SAVOURY BYS
now that the dinner's over
we're all fucked and no one's sober
and we took poor old nan
and locked her in the shed
carrot turnip potato and cabbage
the whole house has been ravaged
spice cake is for desert
what a wicked time!
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